Indeed

The Lord Has Risen.

Thy word is a Lamp unto my Feet, and a Light unto my Path.

Psalm 119:105

As I pounded the pavement of the 10k route around Crofton yesterday, I was bombarded with the signs of spring, Easter, and renewal.  We did not attend church yesterday as we have not for the entire Lenten season.  In fact we have not attended regularly, as a family, since Bridgie was about 9 months old.  I have no excuses for this and each Sunday morning drives the point home. 

I have been running the streets of Crofton since I was 14 years old, 22+ years. I run alone or so it may seem to the many neighbors and family members in Crofton.  What you don't see is the good Lord sitting on my shoulder, proselytizing, counseling, motivating, and healing me.  Running is part of my worship, and for many years a daily dose of Prozac.

Through the child bearing years, the daily runs have dwindled to 3 maybe 4 a week, and the mg of real Prozac have jumped from 20 to 80.  This year has been amazing and uplifting, but rearing and raising three little ones has taken its toll on my body.  Tremendous weight gain, hormone fluctuations, vein insufficiency, high blood pressure, and gall bladder attacks.  This year has been a battle for my body and mind. 

About 9 months ago, I decided to wage war on my health.  I had venous closure of the saphenous vein in both upper legs in June and had my gallbladder removed in July.  Around this same time, Anne Arundel County Parks and Rec announced a Sprint Triathlon at Ft. Smallwood park to benefit people in the county with special needs.  In fact, all proceeds go to help pay the registration fees for the special sports programs.

As a senior in high school one of my "ambitions", printed in the 1992 Arundel year book, was to "successfully complete a triathlon by the time I turn 40".  So the "Rec Deeds for Special Needs Tri" was a no brainer.  As if the good Lord was bonking me on the head saying "hello, you are 36, 40 is 4 years away".  So, I did my first tri.  Mission Accomplished!! Uh, no.

You see the ambition arose while I watched the television coverage of the 1992 Hawaii Ironman World Championships.  I cried my eyes out in my little brothers room, (why he had a tv in his room I do not know), watching all the back stories of the competitors.  The Ambition is an Ironman. 

2.4 mi. swim • 112 mi. bike • 26.2 mi. run

I completed the Rec Deeds Tri and overcame my fear of murky water and that Ambition began to sit on my other shoulder during my runs.  So it is with the Lord.  God has plans for me. 

Ambition and Religion, proselytizing, counseling, motivating, and healing me. Together.

Nine months ago, I embarked on a vigorous plan to get healthy.  To take my body back, because I am going to need it.  I had to figure out what my body can and cannot handle since the gallbladder is gone, how to get rid of unwanted pounds, and get fit.  I did this on my own for about 6 months and was mildly successful.  Despite the vigorous workouts and "eating right", the scale would not budge.  From February until now I have been using a product called Advocare (advocare.com), to help me control hunger, energy levels, and overall health.

In January, I scheduled a physical for March.

 I have seen this primary care Dr. for about 6 years.  The wait is so long, she is somewhat scatterbrained and slow, but once you get her in the room she is so present and thorough.  March 23 came and my doctor spent 90 minutes with me without leaving the room.  We went through my whole history and then we talked about overall health, losing weight, and losing the Prozac.  We went through what I was eating and not eating, exercise schedule, and overall stress triggers.  It is here that she introduced me to a book that has helped me TREMENDOUSLY.  "Eat to Live" by Dr. Mark Fuhrman.  Absolutely amazing.

Now I am eating my beans and greens, training like mad, and off the Prozac. For the record, I have no problem with medication for depression or anxiety, and will probably have to revisit using it again in my lifetime, but for now I want by body to be clean.

And here lies the purpose of this long winded chronology.  I want to be clean, I want my family to be clean, I want to simplify my home and it's contents, so that we may focus on each other and the Good Lord.  And as any child, husband, or partner knows....If momma ain't happy and healthy, ain't nobody gonna be happy and healthy.

The Lord has Risen Indeed.

The journey continues in a quest for a simple balance.  I have taken my body back and now must give parts of it back to my family and the Lord.  I have a busy triathlon schedule this summer and am planning to conquer an Ironman in 2014, the year I turn 40.  Who is with me?

God has plans for me and my family and they swell way beyond any personal passions or ambitions.  What are God's plans for you?  chirp, chirp, chirp... ;0)

Mermaid Freak Out

Today I completed the Emily Schindler Memorial Triathlon

(800 yd swim, 9 mile bike, 3 mile run)

1:24:03 by my own calculations

Was a great, great, morning.  Lots of friendly volunteers...from the county cops making the trail intersections safe, to the young teenagers timing the lap swimmers.  All volunteers in pink.  If you are interested in Emily Schindlers story please click here:

http://www.spyswimming.org/triathlon.htm

Many of Emily's youth swimming records still stand as evidenced on the pool record wall.

So, okay, I must report on the Mermaid Freak Out.  The first leg of the race was the 800yd swim, 16 laps or 32 lengths.  No problem for me as I have been consistently training over the last year at 2000m to 4000m.  I registered with a swim time of 15:30 for 800yd.  This was a truthful and attainable goal as I have done so successfully on more than one occasion. 

When I registered at 6 am this morning, I was put in a lane with 4 other swimmers of "about" the same ability.  Uh, no, this was not the case. Twas the young whippersnapper, the seasoned veteran, the fit newbie, and me.  The young whippersnapper takes off as we knew he would, the veteran is next at a comfortable pace, the newbie heads out more reserved.  Then me.  For some unknown reason I feel the need to keep up with the newbie, which has me sucking air after the first length.  By the third length, I am crawling with my head above water.  By the fourth length, I am looking at the lifeguard hoping he is watching me and the young whippersnapper is trying to pass me, followed by the veteran.  We reach the wall and water is everywhere, feet in my face, elbows in my side.  By the fifth length I cannot even put my head in the water.  I AM PANICKING.  Seriously.  This is what it feels like to think you are drowning even though I can swim quite strongly.  Lengths six, seven, and eight I breast stroke in an attempt to calm down, catch my breath, and start over.  By the 9th length, I am able to put my head back in the water and get into a groove. I swim the rest of the way at my pace.  Whippersnapper is out of the water and I have 6 lengths to go, Veteran out 4 lengths to go, Newbie out 2 lengths to go.  OUT.  Wow, I have never, ever experienced this kind of Panic in the water, even in open water which is my nemesis.  This would have made the perfect scene for a lifeguard training video on swimmer distress. Sheesh! 

I don't know what my swim time was yet, and I am very curious.  I know that whippersnapper was finished in 10 minutes or so.  As terrible as this panic was,  I am thankful for the learning experience of swimming around, under, and beside other swimmers.  Usually, I am the only one in my lane when I swim.

That which does not kill us makes us stronger. 

 That is the last time I tell the truth for my swim time.

I really could have used the help of Tasha and Uniqua and their Mermaid Freak Out.

Temper Tantrums...

Ever seen a 36 year old woman have a temper tantrum?  No, well then you must not be married to one.

"My Dear Brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry"  ---James 1:19

I have had this verse taped to my bathroom mirror since my neighbor posted it to her facebook status. As a reminder, motivation, and advice.  For the most part, I listen, keep my mouth shut, and am patient.  However, 3-4 times a year I have some pretty major meltdowns and they are usually over things I would deem pretty silly, ridiculous even.  They usually start with closing doors a little harder than I should, stomping around, ranting or mumbling to myself, and escalate to throwing something. 

Yesterday it was a water bottle, against the mud room wall.  I had my cell phone in one hand and the water bottle, from FAMILY bike shop of all places, in the other.  Even in my blinding anger I had sense enough  not to throw the phone.

I should have thrown the phone, because it was all the stupid cell phones fault. What started out as a nice, slow, easy, Sunday morning ended in a 36 year old temper tantrum.  ALL I wanted to do was go meet my friend Rachel at the BWI airport park for a group bike ride.  So, I had everything packed up in the truck ready to go. Bike, helmet, shoes, water, Clif Shots, oatmeal to eat on the way, cell phone.....cell phone, where is my cell phone!?!

In the van, right where it always is.  Because if you know me you know I don't carry that darn thing around.  It stays in the car for emergencies.  So, I threw the cell phone onto the front seat of the truck and then ran inside to quickly eat the oatmeal I had prepared.  Had I just listened to Jerry and taken a power bar for the ride up, everything would have been fine.  (well not really, see moral of the story).  If I had taken the power bar and gotten in the truck with my cell phone I would have been on my way.  But no, instead I ate my oatmeal, gave everyone kisses and headed out to the truck.  Only to find, no cell phone.  I searched the entire truck, under the seats, beside all the doors, underneath the truck, etc...  I KNOW I put it in here!!!! Begin ranting/mumbling here.  Into the house....Did I bring my cell phone in here?  No.  Back to the truck, where the bleeepity, bleep, bleep?

Back inside...Jerry says I'll call it...no go.  Jerry checks the truck....no phone, Jerry checks the pantry where I got the oatmeal, no phone.  By now it is 12:40, supposed to meet at 1.  Jerry tries the truck one more time, as I storm through the house.  Jerry finds the phone under the passenger seat wedged up next to the console.  Problem solved....NO WAY!!!! It's now 12:47, not gonna make it by 1. 

Meeting in the Mud Room

Jerry asks what I want to do...I burst into tears and start screaming about never being able to get out of this house and think about throwing the phone in my hand but throw the water bottle instead.  The next 10 minutes are filled with sobbing, snotting, cursing, and all around frustration.

True to form, Jerry bears it all and talks me down, hugs me, and tells me all of my frustrations with life are justified and that life is hard.  He asks me what I want to do now...um, blow my nose?  It is decided that I will go on my bike ride around Crofton instead.

Off I go on my ride, I ride up the parkway towards Layton Street thinking I will cross over 424 and head up Reidel Road.  I am almost to 424 when my seat feels funny...The seat was all the way down and twisting,  Ugh.  I contemplate finishing the ride with a loose seat, think better of it and head home.  Might as well throw in the towel and bag the ride, but no I tighten the seat and head out again and decide just to stay on the parkway in case I need to get home again.  Takes a long time to loosen up and get into a groove, what with people crossing the street, cars not stopping at stop signs, and all that remaining tension.  Eventually, I find my pace and log a solid 20 miles.

It is on this ride that I realize, once again, that I am not in charge.

You see I cannot control people, situations, or life.  God can.

IF I had made it up to the BWI airport loop I would have started out on the ride and my seat would have fell and I would have had to head back home even more frustrated and annoyed and behind the wheel of a truck.  Because, you see, I was unprepared.   I did not have the necessary tools to tighten that seat out there on the loop.  Sure, someone else may have had an Allen wrench and could have helped me.  But God wants and expects more than that for and from me.

God wanted me to learn a lesson that I have already learned.  Be prepared.  Plan ahead. You are not invincible.  You are no longer you, you are a family. A friendly, albeit frustrating, reminder to pay attention to the small things.

Because I did not make it on my planned ride, my family was able to enjoy another relaxing afternoon at the park. Together.

For these things I am thankful and a humble servant.

And with these people I am blessed.

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind". ---Dr. Seuss

Team Travis

Take a minute to honor the fallen:

http://www.lacrosseplayground.com/tags/fallen-heroes-lacrosse-classic

You're Gonna Miss This...

You're gonna want this back. 

You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast.

These are some good times so take a good look around.

You may not know it now, but you're gonna miss this.

http://www.lyrics.com/youre-gonna-miss-this-lyrics-trace-adkins.html

Lying on the floor in Erin's room at bed time last nite, I could not get this song out of my head.  Instead of thinking of the one thousand things I needed to get done, like I usually do, I started thinking of the fun morning we had with some great friends.  Bike riding, playing at the park, and "NO NUTS" (donuts in Eoin speak)! 

Baby, Just Slow Down!

I wish I had been able to take more pictures of all the kids this day, however, the battery in my camera was exhausted.  Shocker!

My friend Melissa and I had a chance to have some coffee and watch the kids ride around the court.  It always amazes me how aware they actually are.  3 five year olds on big bikes, 2 three year olds on trikes, 1 2 year old wandering around, and one in a stroller, all in a 15 foot by 20 foot space and no accidents.  They are remarkably adept at staying out of each other's way.   We had a good chuckle after overhearing this conversation...

Kate: "Erin, you wanna play like we're 7?"

Erin: "YEAH!"

Gavin: "Yeah, and I'll be 5!"

I wonder what 7 and 5 year olds do that 5 and 3 year olds don't...

On another note, Bridgie was caught putting her hair into pig tails this week.

And she wore them all day, even through her nap!

Erin would have had those suckers out in 3.2 seconds.

(thanks Aunt Melissa for the minnie shirt)

We had a nice, slow, family filled weekend.  Mine started with an early morning breakfast with Bridgie.

She told me in no uncertain terms that the wrapper of that nutri-grain bar was hers!

The bar itself was good too.

We spent Saturday afternoon with our good friends, the Mannings, and the rest of the Kelly cousins at Ethan and Austen's 2nd Birthday party.

Bridgie devoured the attention from McKenzie and Brady!

On Sunday, we went to Kinder Farm Park to see the new baby pigs.  Mommy and Daddy got some much needed one on one time with each of the kids.

Girlfriend loves to feel the breeze and tries to catch it with her tongue!

Apparently he missed the "NO Drinking and Sliding" Sign.

Independent, adventurous, and non stop.  Is this my Erin?  So proud of how far she has come.

Erin and Daddy enjoyed a bowl of Ice cream to cap off a wonderful weekend.

Daddy: "Erin, this is fun.  We should do this more often."

Erin:  "Yes, yes we should".

Erin's sense of humor has exploded.  She tells made up knock knock jokes that are actually funny.  She "gets" the humor in shows like Phineas and Ferb.  And she is able to turn events from her day into funny stories.

Erin:  "Hey Mom, today at school I told "Mary" and "Sally" that Rapunzel hit Flynn Rider over the head with a Frying Pan.  And they just stared at me".

Me: "What do you mean?"

Erin: "You know, stared at me, like this...(insert, bug eyed picture of Erin)."  Raucous laughter ensues.

Yeah, I'm gonna miss this.

When you're a Jet...

Yesterday was an indoor, play with your toys, fight with your brother and sister, sit on the naughty step, get creative kind of day.  I HAD to get control of the laundry yesterday.  I am talking over 10 loads (small ones mind you).  Have no idea how it happened.  So, my kids learned the meaning of bored and they rose to the challenge.

Bridgie became adventurous and put two hands up on the only step in our house!!! She paid for it with a big bonk on the forehead, but progress is progress.

Erin got creative with the blocks and made a castle for Jasmine, complete with swimming pool.

Eoin set up West Side Story, the Cars versus the Dinos.

"When you're a Jet,
You're a Jet all the way
From your first cigarette
To your last dyin' day.

When you're a Jet,
If the spit hits the fan,
You got brothers around,
You're a family man!

You're never alone,
You're never disconnected!
You're home with your own:
When company's expected,
You're well protected!"